I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize