We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
