How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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