My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
