i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
