Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
