Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
