why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
