i would punch a child for taco bell
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
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