Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize