this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Randomize
