Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
