I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
