Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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