I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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