Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i came on her dog
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize
