i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize