i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
