garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
