I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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