At least make sure they are 18
Why
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Randomize
