The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
