did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
