he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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