I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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