I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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