I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
