I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
