she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
