Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
