strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
