do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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