I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
