Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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