So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
