If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
