It's just like the Real World with babies
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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