can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Someone shit on the floor
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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