ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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