butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
