I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
