im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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