I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
