9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
