new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The air was thick with penises
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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