There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
