I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
