Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
