Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
