In the future we'll all be gay
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
