Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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