Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
