Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
