Screwed.edu
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
